As you, Readers, might know, my Dad was in London this semester, leaving me all by lonesome with my mom in Shamokin Dam. Scary thought in itself, but it was made right by the freedom it gave me to get my mind right. As far as I can tell without asking him a bunch of questions, he was the dean of students, per se, for Susquehanna University’s London Program. I suppose it was a success. We talked on the phone every now and then, mostly about fantasy football and my grad school application process.
As I was stuck in Selinsgrove, I met a whole bunch of students, randomly, at bars and such, who knew my dad. As I explain to everyone, I try to keep the fact that I’m his son under wraps for as long as possible, until they get really inquisitive, or they tell me their major is in the business school, of which my dad is a professor. Now, lots of students have an affinity for their professors. But the pouring out of praise for my dad’s work as a professor of accounting is simply stunning.
They don’t placate me, as my dad’s son, by telling me he’s a good teacher, or some generic shit like that. They get genuinely hyped-up when they talk about him. (It might help that I’m still college-age and I can relate to them). I know plenty of p-kids and I know that this is rare. Most of the time they avoid offspring of professors for fear of it negatively affecting grades or something. But with these people, I hear stuff like “He’s my advisor,” or “I had him for an intro class that I failed, but he wasn’t the problem, I was,” or “I never had him for class, but I see him around, and he says hi” or “My friends who hang in Apfelbaum a lot always talk about him.”
Now, it’s pretty hard to go to Bot’s or BJ’s and not be surrounded by business majors, especially on a weeknight. They aren’t the most motivated students, and they don’t have a heavy workload, either. My dad is probably one of the first people to admit that, though I’m sure he’s not the cause of that. The reason this is important is that my dad is somehow able to make a connection with students beyond the curriculum. I mean, how interesting can Accounting and Information Systems be? How interesting can you make such topics? I can’t imagine that there are very engrossing topics discussed in his lectures. So how does he do it?
He does it through respect. Keepin’ it real, keepin’ everything in perspective. Us Habeggers, we know how to communicate meaningfully with people from all walks of life. Not sure why, not sure how, we just do.
I was at Bot’s not too long ago, and this group of three girls kept eyeing me (and my friends, I guess, but unlikely), and they came over and started talking to me. As always, you know, you try to make as many connections with strangers you talk to as possible to make things less awkward, less strange. Well, they were all over 21 perhaps (fakes are prevalent in the Grove). Two were Graphic design majors (good, got that in common–I’m doing that at my job), the third was an accounting major. I kept mum, but my buddies did not. They were like, yo, your last name is HABEGGER! And then this girl freaked the fuck out. She’s like, oh your dad’s so brilliant, oh my oh my oh my I can’t believe I met his son holy shit holy shit.
It was like one of those encounters when starstruck people meet friends or relatives of rock stars or politicians or football players. But in my case, my dad’s just a professor. There’s probably what, like a 100 professors at Susquehanna? And I’m the son. Not the actual person. Strange.
I shared this experience with my dad over email, and his response was one of those, heh, add it to the list of strange experiences, because this shit happens to him all the time. He barely knows these people. He’ll have students come in and want him to be their advisor, even though they aren’t taking accounting classes. He’ll meet up with alumni that he barely talked to when they were at Susquehanna and they’ll be ready with a story for him about how he changed their lives, blah, blah, blah.
My dad doesn’t consider himself a good teacher. And from the way I know him as a son, I would have to agree, without even seeing him do his thang in the classroom. Sure, he’s funny like me, and we both aren’t all that great at keeping a coherent train of thought going when we speak publicly. But what we do do, is make a personal connection with everyone in the room.
When I was leading the band, or doing the McDaniel Free Press editorship thang, I knew that I wasn’t the most qualified, nor would I consider myself the best ever, but I can look in the mirror and say that I did it my way, that under my leadership, those groups had the best experience they could have had at that time in their lives. Put simply, I was the most fun. But not in a who-the-fuck cares type way. No, more of a challenging, rewarding way. Fun because I kept it in perspective, because I kept it real-a. I got it right-ta.
If we want to make this world a better place, we’re gonna have to start with ourselves. Learn to learn how to respect people. How to connect with them. Don’t be a douche. But don’t be uptight either. Don’t take sides, but don’t be too firm, either. Read people. Influence them by your example. And above all, have fun.
Fuck the naysayers ’cause they don’t mean a thing. This is the style we bring.
