[Disclaimer: This article was originally published for April Fools’ Day, and it should not be interpreted as factual reporting.]
I am writing this letter to the editors as someone who constantly reads your publications, but also as someone who loves McDaniel, or I mean, Western Maryland College. I bring to your attention that this most recent issue of the Free Press makes very unfounded and biased claims about our beloved campus and the people who work here.
But before I move into the faults of this issue, allow me to praise your hard work and dedication to bring news to the Western Maryland community. Your devotion to seek the truth is only rivaled by your dexterity with words and other media. You have helped Western Maryland become a better community, all thanks to the great variety of articles you have published over the past years.
One such example is the article “[Western Maryland] Graffiti: A Hidden World,” which showcased the level or artistry and creativity of students at Western Maryland.
You listen to students’ opinions, as you write an article addressing the issue of each and every one of your popular polls on the website, after the students have made their voice be heard.
Perhaps the greatest contribution to Western Maryland from you has been the Arts & Culture section, a section I believe is as crucial–if not, more important–than the News. Everyday I wake up to read a new article that describes the cultural diversity and high talent of the students at Western Maryland.
Because of this, I was disappointed when I read this month’s issue of the Free Press. Many of your claims seem satirical and out-of-place. You make so many claims that are untrue and biased, the most shocking of these being the article discussing the purge of alumni since this is untrue. I can testify to this as an alumni of Western Maryland College.
And this is not the first time you publish an issue with such barbarity and satire. Last April, you published a similar issue, and I must say I was disappointed, but I thought it might be a one-time event. I am afraid it wasn’t.
The intention of this letter to the editors is to bring to your awareness that us, the students at Western Maryland, care about the image of our campus. It hurts us when one of our best attributes, the Free Press, betrays their principles and paint a negative picture of our perfect, beloved school. I hope our voice, the voice of the student body, is heard and I hope you do the necessary changes to once restore the good name of Western Maryland College.
Sincerely yours,
Nigel Thornberry
Editor’s note: Nigel Thornberry mysteriously disappeared after sending this letter to the editors. We believe he’s yet again another victim of the Alumni Purge.
